It's a climb.

I've been so busy lately that I haven't had time to update this. Here goes nothing...


I'm finally happy. I hit some speed bumps along the way, but I just rolled over them and took my time. I lost what I used to call my best friend, but I'm still staying strong. I've started looking at life in a different perspective. My closest friends are freshman and I wouldn't change it for the world. My grades are doing horrible. Almost didn't get a 2.0 this quarter. Swimming is going really well. Just recovering and building back up my endurance because I was out for so long. My broken hand is healing very well, and I couldn't be happier. Senior year is going by way too fast now. I really don't want to go away to college anymore. I don't want to lose everything I've gained here. =\

Well, I'll start updating this every once in a while. :)

Crying my last tear.

I have seriously never felt so replaced in my entire life. Sad thing is, you can't even see how much you are hurting me. You're too blinded by how you are friends with this person that you can't see how bad I'm hurting. As I sat here tonight and listened to everything you were telling me, I cried. I cried because I'm going off to college in 4 months and you aren't even trying to save what we have. This shouldn't be this way. I don't know whether to give up now or to keep trying. Giving up sounds so much easier. I just want to start crying right now.

Update

I haven't been on here in so long. Been way too busy with something I wanna call my future.

Over the past 2 months, I've:
-Become closer to my bestfriend, but further now that time goes on.
-Visited my future college.
-Became an enrolled student.
-Put a down payment on my new apartment.
-Started High school swimming.
-Had no drama.
-Had the love of my life move to the other side of the country.
-Haven't had my laptop since New Years, hence why I haven't updated this.
-Stopped talking to my dad.
-Broken my left hand and fractured my right hand. (I was angry =/)
-Realized what I need in life.
-Stopped talking to some people.
-Grew closer to others.
-Lost weight.
-Became a more giving person.
-Noticed that life is just a prayer handed from god.
-Started keeping my room clean daily.
-Tried to have a better relationship with my sister.
-Gotten in a car accident.
-Spent way too much money.
-Met new people.
-Stayed single.
-Tried to love life...


I'll start writing again now that I'm gonna get a new charger in 3 days :)

A year from now

Complete and total adoration,
My gift to you, my heart was yours,
In ten weeks you shaped it,
In one night you murdered it.
Torn from my chest and laid at your feet,
That first step you took was the worst.
Since then you've walked a thousand miles in solace and short remark,
And I still have these memories,
But we'll never see what we could have been.
Remember when we talked about where we'd be a year from now?
Remember when you held my hand like you'd never let it go?
Remember, cause that's all you can do.
We'll never make another memory,
We'll never make another memory.
I wish I'd have died in your arms the last time we were together,
So I wouldn't have to wake without you today.
This time I thought things were real,
You said they were,
What happened?
You were a priority,
Was I an option?
I let you see a side of me that I don't share with anyone.
Promises are just words unless they are fulfilled.
Knew from the beginning all I had to offer you was my heart,
I'm sorry that it wasn't enough.
So, we'll go our own ways,
And hopefully you'll remember the things I've told you,
Hopefully you'll understand that everything I said was in sincerity.
A broken heart is not what I wanted from this,
But I guess I've learned from it.
But aren't you supposed to learn from your mistakes?
I don't consider this a mistake,
I just wish the story didn't end this way,
Cause I'm still in love with the person who helped me write it.
Remember when you held my hand like you'd never let it go?
Remember when we talked about where we'd be a year from now?

Halo

Remember those walls I built
Well baby they're tumbling down
And they didn't even put up a fight
They didn't even make a sound
I found a way to let you in
But I never really had a doubt
Standing in the light of your halo
I got my angel now

It's like I've been awakened
Every rule I had you breakin'
It's the risk that I'm takin'
I ain't never gonna shut you out

Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away

I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo) halo
I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo) halo
Woah...

Hit me like a ray of sun
Burning through my darkest night
You're the only one that I want
Think I'm addicted to your light
I swore I'd never fall again
But this don't even feel like falling
Gravity can't forget
To pull me to the ground again

Feels like I've been awakened
Every rule I had you breakin'
The risk that I'm takin'
I'm never gonna shut you out

Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away

I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo) halo
I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo) halo
I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo)

Halooooo ouuuu
Halooooo ouuuu
Halooooo ouuuu
Ouuuuu ouuuuu ouuuuu

Everywhere I'm looking now
I'm surrounded by your embrace
Baby I can see your halo
You know you're my saving grace
You're everything I need and more
It's written all over your face
Baby I can feel your halo
Pray it won't fade away

I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo) halo
I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo) halo
I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo) halo
I can feel your halo (halo) halo
I can see your halo (halo) halo

Goodbye, Hello.

"There's a moment in life where you can't recover any more from another break-up. And even if this person bugs you sixty percent of the time, well you still can’t live without her. And even if she wakes you up every day by sneezing right in your face, well you love her sneezes more than anyone else's kisses."

-Only you...

A new year calls for changes. I am gonna try and be more forgiving towards some things, less forgiving about others. I'm gonna take everything day by day and I'm gonna not pass up a good opportunity. Even if i turns out bad, at least I gave it a chance. I'm gonna move on from the past and set forth on my journey through the future. I'm gonna get my grades up and make my mom proud. Last but not least I'm gonna continue to find myself and continue to be who I want to be and not change for anyone. Goodbye 2008, Hello 2009.